Welcome back: Cops Corner

APRIL 24
MUSICAL CHAIRS
9:18 a.m. — 1700 block of Morrill Street. Civil Disturbance. A motel employee reported a man took the plastic patio furniture set from the motel room he was renting and took it across the street to the new place he started renting. A longstanding dispute about the plastic pieces has been ongoing for months, and police advised the two men might have to resolve the matter in court.

May 7
Ex-communion-cated
3:16 p.m. — 100 block of South Pineapple Avenue. Harassment. A church financial director reported that a man became irate at a Sunday service about the size of the piece of bread he received at communion. The man then proceeded to call the pastor 20 times and leave threatening fax messages for him. The church wanted nothing more to do with the man, and police made plans to deliver the message.

June 16
Element of surprise
12:21 a.m. — 1500 block of Main Street. Public Drunkenness. A man walking down the middle of Main Street, drinking a can of beer, didn’t notice the police officer approaching him, until the officer walked right in front of his path. When the man realized an officer was in front of him, he said, “Oh, snap! You got me!”

July 7
Toe the line
9:08 p.m. — 1500 block of First Street. Trespassing. Police responded to reports of a man bathing in the fountain at City Hall. Police found a man sitting on the edge of the fountain reading a book. The man denied bathing in the water and said he only dipped in his feet. He was issued a trespass warning for the area.

July 13
Indecent proposal
3:30 p.m. — 800 block of Tamiami Trail. Suspicious Person. A man who attempted to rent space at a flea market made the property owner feel uncomfortable when he hugged her for an extended amount of time and kissed her on the cheek. He then said he wished she was not married with children, because she was the kind of woman he “would like to have sex with.” When police contacted the man, he claimed to have sustained head injuries that caused him to forget the incident ever occurred.

July 24
JUST CHILLIN’
7 a.m. — 2100 block of Magnolia Street. Trespassing. A woman, who was pet sitting for her niece, arrived for her daily duty and found her neighbor sitting on the couch. He explained that his air conditioning was broken so he went inside to cool down. Police were unable to contact the man but plan to issue a trespassing warning.

July 29
Coleslaw criminal
1:23 p.m. — 1800 block of Morrill Street. Suspicious Circumstance. A man told police that someone entered his locked home, opened up a new plastic tub of coleslaw and ate a little bit of it. He told police this is not the first time someone has entered his apartment and ate some of his food. Police promised to watch the area carefully.

Aug. 6
Bundled up
2:30 p.m. — 500 block of North Beneva Road. Shoplifting. A woman entered a changing room with several clothing items and then walked out of the store wearing the clothes. Employees found only hangars and tags in the changing room. The woman, wearing multiple layers of clothes, was found in the parking lot and was issued a trespass warning and a court summons.

Aug. 13
Sparks flying
1:06 p.m. — 2100 block of Fifth Street. Fight. A woman reported that her ex-boyfriend, named “Sparks,” came to her house uninvited while she was with a male acquaintance. The two men got into a fight and the ex-boyfriend fled after being struck several times in the face.

Aug. 17
Pry-ority mail
12:28 a.m. — 2500 block of Tenth Street. Suspicious Circumstance. A woman told police she noticed pry marks on her mailbox cover when she went to get her mail. The apartment manager agreed to change the key to the box as a precaution.

Aug. 28
MORE VALUABLE THAN CASH
1 a.m. — 2500 block South Tamiami Trail. Burglary of a Structure. An unknown person broke into the office next to the bar at a local establishment. The suspect climbed through the window, and once inside, opened the door to the office and cut the large padlock on the safe. The suspect left the money in the safe, but removed a bottle of pinot noir from the storage room. The suspect drank half of the bottle and left the half-empty bottle.

Sept. 24
RETURN POLICY
6 p.m. — 2200 block of Hillview Street. Suspicion General. A woman called police after her bike disappeared. The woman explained that a man she knew gave her the bike to use several months earlier. The man then texted her, saying he needed the bike back for his daughter to use. At some point, an unknown person took the bike from the woman’s home. A day later, the woman received a text message from the man’s daughter “thanking her” for giving the bike back.

Oct. 10
GETTING DOWN TO BUSINESS
10:10 p.m. — 1000 block of Indian Beach Drive. Suspicion General. An officer responded to a report of a disturbance. When the officer arrived, the home appeared unkempt and a man and woman were scrambling to put on their clothes. The man told the officer he had arranged to meet the woman so he could pay her for sexual activity, and they had had a small dispute. The woman acknowledged that the man offered to pay her electric bill in exchange for sexual favors. The woman was outraged to discover that prostitution was still a crime, even on private property.