Give it up for the optimist

Where do you sit on the glass half-full or glass half-empty spectrum?

While you ponder that, let’s take a look at how your fellow Americans are feeling of late. On New Year’s Day, the Associated Press released a poll that had asked how Americans viewed the past year. Some surprises: While almost half thought things were basically unchanged from 2015 — really — 33 percent saw 2016 as negative and 18 percent saw it as positive. But 55 percent stated they thought their own lives would improve during 2017. Let’s hear it for the optimists.

But what if you’re a half-empty person? Psychologist Martin Seligman, dubbed “the father of positive psychology,” says both of these ways of thinking and reacting to situations are what he calls habits of thinking. And they are habits that can lead to much different outcomes. Pessimists tend to give up more easily, feel depressed more often and have poorer health than optimists, according to Seligman. He reports that optimists generally do better in school, work and extracurricular activities. They often perform better on aptitude tests and have better overall health. That, says Seligman, is the incredible power of positive thinking.

Indeed. An increasing amount of research indicates that the core feeling of optimism — that things will be OK — is an important factor in longevity. It is linked to a reduced risk of developing physical and mental disorders, as well as an increased life span without major illness.

And now, we have yet one more conclusion from the famous Nurses Health Study, which has been analyzing data from 70,000 people over the past decades, that proves optimism is life affirming.

Researchers from Harvard’s T.H. Chan School of Public Health found that women who were optimistic had a significantly reduced risk of dying from several major causes of death over an eight-year period, compared with women who were less optimistic. The most optimistic women had a 16 percent lower risk of dying from cancer; 38 percent lower risk of dying from heart disease; 39% lower risk of dying from stroke; and a 52 percent lower risk of dying from infection. Now that’s news I’ll raise my half-full glass to cheer about.

Back to Seligman’s “habits of thinking.” It is his — and many other professionals— experience that optimism can be acquired by changing your habits. And with medical research pointing out that this acquisition would be well worth some effort, we did some research of our own to compile a list of those habits of optimistic people and how pessimists might acquire them.

Kregg Nance is a family mediator who has had a good bit of experience in this area in his Solutions for Couples practice. Nance says the key is to change the way you think about your experiences.

“Too many individuals see themselves as a helpless observer,” he said. “You need to view yourself as an active participant and, most important, focus on solutions and an action plan when you get stuck.”

This might be the no-more-hand-wringing rule.

The second rule goes along with the first. It’s all about reframing negative experiences. If you are continually rethinking negative situations, you won’t get to the positive. Eliminate phrases like, “I can’t ...” with “I’ll try ...” or “Let’s see how that will work out.”

Another way to short circuit negative thinking is to just turn it off. If you love nature, get outside and focus on the beauty around you, or spend time totally focused on your children or trying to prepare a new recipe. Turn off the negative train of thoughts.

Many people get stuck with the “whole world, country, universe, etc. is seriously going down the tube” attitude. This is classic pessimism, and the cure for this is to realize that you really have a limited amount of control over global affairs. So get real and do something you do have control over. Volunteer for a cause you love and make a difference. Act locally.

Spend time with positive people. We’ve all experienced the incredible energy drain of a Debbie Downer friend. This may sound cruel, but limit your time with that kind of person or even cut them out of your life. Just think of those health enhancing benefits of optimism. And, optimism can be contagious. Find some friends who can spread it to you.

Finally, just be kind — to yourself. Pessimists have a tendency to be extremely self-critical. Self-compassion is a characteristic of an optimist. You can develop this by simply eating better, kicking the dog out of your bed to enhance your sleep, or taking an extra 10 minutes to walk in the neighborhood in the sun and fresh air. And look to the future and not the past, says Nance. It may be a lot rosier than you think.