Theater review: 'Older than Dirt'

What’s so funny about age, aches and memory loss? Almost everything, judging by “Older than Dirt” at FST. Their latest original cabaret comedy is Rebecca and Richard Hopkins’ brainchild. With contributions from most of the comedy writers in town.*

Aside from periodic one-liners, the mockery is mostly musical. The songs are a grab-bag of scurrilous classics and original song parodies. Jim Prosser created the arrangements under Darren Server’s musical direction. Prosser also bangs out the tunes on the old piano like a one-man band from Vaudeville days. Which some in the audience may fondly remember.

Think comedy with a senior citizen’s discount. Dane Becker, Richie McCall, Emily Mikesell and William Selby deliver the laughs.

In the first act, they glide on stage in spiffy tuxedoes and smart dance moves. Once they start singing, you realize much of the satire is aimed at Baby Boomers. Those crazy 1960s kids promised to live fast, die young and leave good-looking corpses. Sadly, many did not achieve this ambition.

Rebecca Hopkins’ song parody of “Do You Remember These?” spreads out the archeological relics of 1950s and ’60s pop culture—it’s enough to send sensitive millennials screaming to their safe spaces. Saturday morning cartoons; BB guns; Howdy Doody; TV rabbit ears; penny loafers; and the duck-and-cover drill of the Cold War. Happy Days, kids!

Hopkins’ original “Methuselah Rock” pokes a stick in the never-ending steel wheelchair tours of aging rockers who pay the bills by feeding the nostalgia addiction of their aging fans.

Tom Lehrer’s “When You’re Old and Gray” is a carpe diem love song that speaks to young people everywhere, although not here. To paraphrase: Love me now while you’re young and pretty, because I’ll hate you when you’re old. A tasty razor blade sandwich, as only Chef Lehrer can serve.

Hopkins’ “Beauty and the Deceased” (to the tune of “Beauty and the Beast”) lights a candle in the wind to a May-December romance. Or more like a May-December 31 romance at 11:59 p.m. Young love waits to cash in on really, really old love. Romance isn’t dead. But it’s just a matter of time.

After the bathroom br— sorry, intermission — the second act kicks in. Returning Baby Boomers vainly hope they’ll be forgotten. No such luck, sunshine.

Hopkins and Prosser’s “Boomers” and “Age of Aquairus” lobs a cyanide cream pie in their happy hippy faces. These paeans to urology and Paxil are set to the tunes of “Age of Aquarius” and “Let the Sunshine In” from “Hair.” Is nothing sacred? Nope. But I’m happy to report that nobody got naked.

Comedy colossus Shel Silverstein’s “I Never Expected” is the lament of a one of those fast-living, photogenic freaks who didn’t die at age 27. The man’s now lost all hope of ever becoming a good-looking corpse.

Stephan deGhelder’s “Diarrhea” / “Super Pooper” transforms Abba’s cloying “Mamma Mia” and “Super Trooper” into odes to diarrhea and regularity, respectively. Odd concept, eh? But everything comes out all right in the end.

Wild-and-crazy Steve Martin’s “Grandmother’s Song” starts as an icky- sweet ditty strummed on a ukulele. After a few greeting card bromides, the verses turn increasingly bizarre.

Put a live chicken in your underwear.

Go into a closet and suck eggs.

Martin’s timeless advice still applies to young and old alike.

Carl Signman and Herb Magidson’s “Enjoy Yourself; It’s Later Than You Think” is another belated carpe diem. Some audience members apparently thought the show was over and hit the parking lot. We trust they’re enjoying themselves. Somewhere.

The ad hoc quartet delivers great performances. Emily Mikesell is both a versatile comic actor and fine singer with a rafter-shaking voice. William Selby does justice to the country/western satires of Tim Dubois and Jerry Reed—whom he actually resembles. Mercurial Richie McCall flows from craven to brazen in an eye blink; his emotional vibe turns on a dime. Dane Becker is the revue’s designated thirty-something—a song-and-dance man who pitches insurance scams and dystopian nursing homes to trusting seniors.

Depending on the scene, costume designer Susan Angermann decks out the singing/dancing quartet in pastel old-folks sweaters, tuxes, evening gowns, Day-Glo tunics, baggy pants and floppy grey caps. Choreographer Kathryn Gasper keeps everybody moving in interesting patterns, while making sure nobody falls off the tiny stage.

Somewhere high and far away, Richard Hopkins directs. Probably chuckling the whole time.

Expect puns, more puns, old jokes, old people jokes, flatulence jokes, Viagra jokes, Depends jokes, and jibes at elderly drivers. The songs and satire are all good-natured—and maybe a little too nice. I found myself wishing for occasional bad taste. The Grim Reaper dragging one performer off stage with his scythe like Sandman Sims at the Apollo, maybe.

“A funny thing happened on the way to the grave! You’re coming with me, man!”

“Aggghhhh!”

Now that’s comedy.

But for some reason, FST isn’t returning my calls.

So, if you’re over 50, enjoy a laugh at your expense. If you’re under 50, see what you’re in for, if you dare.

Sooner or later, the joke’s on you.

*Rebecca Hopkins, Stephan deGhelder, Nick Santa Maria, Jim Prosser and Phyllis Silverman created the original song parodies.